Blended + Intentional

It takes two mature adults to dismantle a union + walk away with everyone minimally unscathed. It takes two caring adults that despite all unfortunate circumstances to make a concerted effort to raise emotionally healthy, secure children. Even more, it takes two adults dedicated to ensuring that the common goal is always about the children. I am convinced that my need to get along with my ex for the sake of my children has always been my ultimate priority. I am even more convinced that children suffer not because of messy separations but due to immature adults that refuse to remain focused on the best interest of the children.

One of my most monumental seasons to date has been overcoming divorce + co-parenting with my ex. It has been infuriating, laborious, but most of all it has been humbling. Sometimes, people often questioned our need to get along as if it would be easier to disagree just because we had history. Meanwhile, we were trying to salvage the remnants of a life that was built on fertile ground that was never tilled. Every dinner, every function celebrated together, every gift purchased for each other + each other’s spouse was always to show a united front for the sake of our children.

So here we are, 7 years removed from marriage + both my ex and I have moved on amicably to raise our children while bringing 2 more individuals in an already established unit. Has it been easy? Not always. Have we made some mistakes? Absolutely! More importantly, have we always kept the children first? Indeed! Sometimes it takes everyone being on the same page + genuinely loving each other to demonstrate the best example of a healthy blended family. Whenever any anniversary or holiday rolls around, you can guarantee that the adults consider each other just as much as we consider the children. Besides, we are a family, a modern family working hard to raise secure children + break stereotypes about how “we” should raise our children. We are far from perfect + we still make tons of mistake, but at the end of the day, the one thing we can all agree on is that we love our children + we love each other + that is always enough.